Style Questions | Wife Beater and Well Endowment

It seems like you guys have a lot of questions regarding undergarments of all types. First we had the whole commando debacle...now here are more:

I'm from Texas but will be starting an internship on Capitol Hill in January and need a little help. What type of undershirt is work-appropriate - a wife-beater or a regular tee? I like wife-beaters much better, but is it appropriate to have it show through dress shirts?
Wife-beaters are my preference when heading towards the bed, but in regards to the daily going-on's of life I would suggest a v-neck. While wife-beaters occasionally help so the old spouse abuser doesn't catch any underarm drip, v-necks have the advantage of making sure no underarm drip makes its way to your dress shirt. And the only thing worse than having your wife-beater show through your shirt is having pit-stains. In any case, in la vida loca de Texas, aren't tank tops considered outerwear?

What are the rules that constitute the type of undershorts you should wear with a business suit? I usually prefer briefs, but because im so well-endowed they end up creating a prominent bulge in my trousers. Boxers, on the other hand, are so loose that I feel naked and like my nether-region is on full display.
The question only gets worst from there, meaning XXX-worst, so Ill cut it short there. My only recommendation is to holster it in an athletic-undergarment. They usually provide support for such "issues". Or you could chill your underwear before putting them on, you know what they say...
But then again, if your well-endowment is causing this much ruckus, have you not considered a penis reduction? I'm just saying, you might wanna google it.